Who Guides Aging Adults Through the Complexities of Aging? The Answer Changed Everything for This Nurse!

Article written by: Susan Vander Pyl, RN, Clinical Care Liaison, Unicity Care Management for The Agewise Institute. Brought to you by 101 Mobility North Jersey

As a nurse for 25 years there are a lot of things that you see.

And a lot of things that you can’t “unsee”.

A career that has spanned from oncology to stem cell to homecare to wellness to pediatrics to geriatrics… a career that has spanned the continuum of care as well as wellness to disease and disease to wellness.

Last fall I saw a need and it started to keep me up at night.

I saw aging adults struggling behind the closed doors of their homes. 

Struggling to keep up with a world that is changing quickly.

Struggling to keep up with the day to day when their mind is changing.

Struggling to keep up with the day to day as their body is changing.

And I found myself asking:

“Is there any kind of service that can help with the transition of aging”. Or in other words, “Is there any kind of service that can be a trusted guide for the complexities that come with aging”.

The crazy thing is - there is information on what to do for children as they “grow up” … but not for adults.

How do you honor your patients or your parents well while you recognize they are aging, that they need more assistance, that if an intervention doesn’t come in the near future they will go from thriving to surviving… and as much as you want to be the answer, you have work, live far away, are trying to juggle everything in your own life, or you recognize that you simply don’t know what you don’t know.

You soon realize there is no rule book on this. And that’s where I landed too. So, I started to look for answers. I talked to my friends who have cared for their parents.

Their answers were – “It’s hard”.

“That time of life was when I ended up in the hospital due to a panic attack”.

“You somehow do what you have to do”.

Sure, there were glimpses of hope within some of the conversations – but the overall take away was… you blindly go forward trying to honor your parents the best you can all while wearing the hat of medical advocate, counselor, uber, medication manager, disease process learner… and daughter/son.

And here is the thing. Even if you want to “do it all” – you are likely drowning and your parent knows it, sees it… and feels horrible being the cause. In these scenarios, you realize no one is winning. Neither you, nor your parent(s).

So conversation after conversation, I sought a solution. And then one conversation contained the words – CARE MANAGER. And with those two words, came an exhale.

A solution!

Then came the search. What company can I recommend without hesitation as a Medical Professional and as a daughter. I was so impressed by the professionalism and posture of the staff at Unicity Care Management, I joined their team and decided to be part of the solution.

Here are some questions I have identified to ask when “shopping” for a care manager:

• The size of the care management company. It is important that there are at least 2 care managers who work with the individual – so if the care manager goes on leave or has PTO, there is someone who knows the client well and can advocate for them

• The company has both nurses and social workers – This allows the whole client to be cared for.

• Accessibility – Are the care managers available if heaven forbid there be an emergency?

• Reputation and collaboration in the community – inquire about what professionals they work with.

• Locations – some parents like to head south for the winter months. Is there a continuum of care available?

Since finding “the” solution, the number of conversations I have had with friends who have said… I wish I had known that those services exist are many - because they recognize the benefit of nurse and social work insights in the aging process.

So how can you help?

Check on your friends who are caring for their parents. While they keep showing up and smiling – chances are they would benefit from putting on the oxygen mask of help through care management. And not only would your friend benefit, but their parents would too.

And in the end, not only will their parents be honored and cared for… but sleep will resume for you dear friend as well.